


Only a Spark

by apropensityforcharm



Series: Season 6 Reaction Fics [1]
Category: Glee
Genre: 6x01 reaction, Angst?, Canon Compliant, M/M, not hugely so
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-12
Updated: 2015-01-12
Packaged: 2018-03-07 05:24:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3162857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/apropensityforcharm/pseuds/apropensityforcharm
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Dave's not Kurt. Maybe that's the best part."<br/>6x01 reaction fic. In which I try and get inside Blaine's head, because he is an enigma to me always. Canon compliant; follows Blaine meeting Dave to Kurt's return to Lima.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Only a Spark

Scandals isn’t crowded like the bars in New York had been. It’s always seemed moribund, but with the comparison there it’s flat in a way that it never was before. Blaine almost turns around and leaves the moment he walks in, but the bouncer said that the bears were dancing tonight, so maybe it won’t be so awful after all. He sits at a table, watches the bears dance, and when he spots David Karofsky in the front line, he’s almost not surprised. Karofsky spots him too – gives him a cheerful smile that makes Blaine’s insides feel warm. When the dance is over Karofsky makes his way over, two beers in a hand and a wide smile on his face.

‘Blaine!’ Karofsky says. ‘Hey! What are you doing here? Last I heard you were in New York with Kurt!’

An iron weight dragging at his guts; every memory that he’s trying to avoid.

But honestly, Blaine is a little drunk and he’s still angry,  _so_ angry about everything that happened, and if he were sober then maybe he would be more careful with his words. But then, maybe he wouldn’t.

‘Kurt and I broke up,’ he says. ‘We – we broke up once and it was my fault and then we got back together and then we got  _engaged_ and then we broke up again and it was his fault.’

David is silent for a moment, turning the beer glass in his hands, watching the condensation disappear beneath the heat of his finger. ‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ he says eventually. ‘Everyone always thought you two were for life.’

‘So did we.’

David nods his head. ‘Right. That was insensitive. Sorry, man.’

Blaine shakes his head, takes a drink of his beer. ‘No, it’s all right. I guess I’m just a bit... bitter.’

David glances over at him. His voice is very measured when he says, ‘You said this time it was his fault?’

Dave – and when did Blaine start thinking of him as  _Dave? –_ is nice. He’s sweet and patient, let’s Blaine talk about all the ways in which his throat still tightens when he thinks of Kurt. And then the anger too, fiery enough that Blaine can’t stop his fingers from twitching for want of a punching bag. Dave talks as well, earnest and honest about the things Kurt had made  _him_ feel once upon a time. It’s probably unkind, Blaine thinks, to bitch about Kurt to his biggest terror in high school. Frankly, Blaine is done being kind right now.

Dave is self-deprecating, not the quickest on the uptake, and he seems more than happy to listen to Blaine when he starts talking about music. Blaine tells him about his job as coach of the Warblers, which Dave seems to think is awesome. He doesn’t have ambitions of his own, seems very simply content with his job in construction administration. Kurt could never be like that, Blaine finds himself thinking. Always a new goal, a steeper mountain to climb, that was how he worked. The contrast is startling. Dave’s not Kurt.

Maybe that’s the best part.

 In the end, Blaine thinks it happens because of how guileless Dave is. It warms him to see how open Dave is about his life now, how willing he is to share, and he feels very strangely  _proud_ of the man in front of him. A man living completely free of deceit. Blaine looks at Dave with his almost childlike smile, eyes trusting and happy, and thinks of a man who hid every sensitive part of himself behind flat eyes and a tightly shut jaw.

He suddenly finds Dave incredibly attractive.

At the end of the night, Dave ends up driving him home and walking to his doorstep. They kiss and Blaine wonders how this turned into a date.

Blaine thinks it must end there, but all through the next day he has an itching in his body, a drive to get out and  _do_ something. He could be what you need, he tells himself. He needs to break himself out of his patterns, shake things up. Coaching the Warblers is the most fulfilling thing he’s done in years, but maybe he should go further. Dave’s not Kurt; he likes football and cheap beer and has no idea who was on the last cover of Vogue. His fashion sense sucks, his only recognition of the word ‘facial’ is dirty, he’s a  _bear_ for crying out loud! He's a simple person. He loves honestly, doesn't hide behind masked smiles and shadowy motives. He's honest, uncomplicated. He’s  _not Kurt._ It doesn’t have to be for long, Blaine thinks. Just long enough to break him out of his  _patterns._

He goes back to Scandals that night. Dave’s there too. They talk again and when Dave kisses him goodbye at his doorstep, this time it’s as boyfriends.

Sam is the first one he tells. He’s looking for a congratulation, a clap on the back for finally getting over his ex. Instead, he gets a white faced silence as Sam stares at him over the coffee shop table. ‘ _Karofsky?’_ Sam blurts. ‘Are you  _insane?’_

Blaine sits back on his chair and folds his arms, tries to ignore his own rising hackles. ‘Dave has matured a lot since we last saw him,’ he says.

‘Dude, he’s a psycho!’ Sam exclaims, throwing his arms up in frustration. ‘He threatened to  _kill_ Kurt! Give him half a chance and next thing you know he’ll be going all Kathy Bates on  _your_ ass too!’

‘Dave is a completely different person now,’ Blaine snaps. He feels trapped in a corner, like one of his foundations has been knocked over and now he’s wobbling. ‘He is  _sweet,_ and  _kind,_ and  _supportive_ to me.’

‘Oh yeah?’ Sam says, an uncharacteristically mocking look in his eyes. ‘I’ll bet he was. Tuck you in at night and turn on your nightlight for you? Chase away all your fears and insecurities?’

‘That’s not fair, Sam,’ Blaine says, hating the way his voice has begun to thicken. ‘That’s not fair at all. I’m – I’m  _trying,_ and for the first time I think I might actually be okay with not being with  _him – ‘_

‘So instead you go for his worst nightmare,’ Sam interrupts. He stands up and collects his jacket from the back of his chair. ‘Okay, fine, if it turns you on then whatever. Just – answer me this, dude. Is this a revenge thing?’

‘What?’

‘Because I know Kurt said some pretty shitty stuff and all, but he’s not like  _evil,_ dude, and you have to know how he’s going to react when he finds out about this.’

It’s not a revenge thing. Right?

‘It’s not a revenge thing,’ he says eventually. ‘I just want to move on.’

Sam stares down at him and shakes his head. ‘Okay,’ he says. ‘Feel free to come to me whenever you sort your shit out, Blaine. I’ll even come pick you up when Karofsky locks you in his basement and starts making you write songs for him or whatever. See you later.’

And then he swings out of the coffee shop and leaves Blaine alone at the table. And he has never felt so isolated.

Rachel is back in town three weeks later, more quiet and sad than he remembers. Blaine has been desperate to see a familiar face again, and after being surrounded every day by uniform and tradition, her theatrics breathe new life into him. She’s obviously pretty out of the loop, but he really doesn’t expect it to hurt as much as it does when she asks, ‘Where’s Kurt?’

He explains what happened as evenly as possible. He doesn’t mention Dave.

To his utter relief, Rachel is kind and unjudging about the whole disaster, and he thinks that maybe he does still have an ally left even if Sam is still fuming. He loves Rachel, but he knows that they were never as close as they could have been, so maybe now is their chance. He stolidly ignores the more unkind parts of his mind that whisper that if Rachel is with him, she must agree with him about the break up. That even Kurt’s best friend knows that he’s in the wrong. It’s petty and small and Blaine feels guilty about the tiny flicker of triumph in his gut, but still it is not doused.

One night spent lazing on the couch, Dave jokingly suggests that Blaine should introduce him to his friends, like he hasn’t known Blaine’s friends longer than Blaine has. Blaine laughs and kisses his cheek, and tries not to think of how many of his friends would draw their proverbial swords should they see Dave in such close company.

Santana would probably outright attack him, he thinks, but his smile quickly fails when he realises that he hasn’t actually spoken to Santana in months. Not since New York, and everything that came with it.

Really, he hasn’t spoken to much of anyone but Rachel and Sam ever since he came back to Lima.

When did it become that David Karofsky was the most present person in his life?

Dave starts referring to them as Yogi and Boo Boo. Blaine hates how it makes him feel – condescended to, small, immature – but let’s Dave say it anyway. He doesn’t figure it’s worth the argument, especially this early in their relationship.

He pushes closer into Dave’s side and ignores the way his chest feels too broad and soft under his cheek.

And then Kurt is back in town.

Blaine’s hard won recovery is gone as fast as though a wildfire had raced through his heart. He feels just as breathless as he did in the first months after Kurt left him, and he hasn’t even seen him yet. But he can’t go back to that, he knows, he just can’t do it again. He’s been moving on, feeling better than he has in a long time. Blaine isn’t going to try and see him, and if Kurt asks after him then he’s going to have to set some boundaries. Break his patterns, so to speak.

Kurt asks to see him.

Blaine accepts. Of course he does. Not because he doesn’t think he could say no, but because Kurt at least deserves civility. And besides – he needs to introduce Kurt to Dave. So to speak.

Seeing Kurt again in Scandals doesn’t hurt like he thought it might. He’s still beautiful. The rich colours and lines of his outfit make him look like a bird of paradise. His voice is so familiar that Blaine is already leaning in to kiss him hello, pure muscle memory, when he realises – that’s not something they do anymore. It doesn’t matter how much Kurt still feels like home. That’s not what they  _are_ anymore.

‘I’m going to get you back,’ Kurt tells him straight out. He says that he doesn’t mean to blurt it out like that, but for the sake of  _clarity_ he has all intents and purposes of earning Blaine’s forgiveness and love. Blaine doesn’t know how to interrupt him to try to ease the sudden pit of snakes in his stomach. He can see Dave over Kurt’s shoulder, standing across the room waiting for Blaine’s signal to swoop in and be the charming, debonair boyfriend, and god, this is Blaine’s nightmare.

He feels desperately sorry for Kurt, and for a moment he considers calling the whole night off to spare his pride.

Break your patterns.

‘I’m seeing someone,’ Blaine says.

Dave makes his entrance, smiling and comfortable, and Blaine watches Kurt’s face. He watches how quickly Kurt gets his expression under control, the split second  _horror_ – yes, that was horror – buried under a politely composed smile. He wonders if Kurt will last the night.

Kurt excuses himself to go to the bathroom after less than two minutes of conversation. The words stumble out of him so fast that Blaine almost misses it, but he heard the edge of tears stain his voice.

He knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that Kurt will be crying in there. The knowledge is an ache in his chest, a very tired sadness that knows there isn’t anything to be done about it. The best any of them can do is try and move on with as few lacerations on their hearts as possible. And Blaine is more aware than anyone that to approach Kurt right now would be the most humiliating thing he could possibly do. He knows Kurt still, he’ll never  _not_ know Kurt, and he knows that Kurt’s stubborn pride doesn’t want anyone to know that he’s hurting. A heart starved in a steel cage; that was the problem all along.

Blaine’s own heart has been dashed by wildfire, scorched and shrivelled and at times just barely beating. He’s harder now, at least on the outside, older and secure in his ability to withstand the weather. He doesn’t think he’ll ever be so easy to trust again. But where fire destroys the weakest parts of the forest, it makes room for growth. Though the flames scour the land, the seeds underground crack under the heat and pressure while the ash provides fertile soil to use, space for new life. Wildfires are cycles of death and life, destruction and rebirth. Of space to live and breathe.

Dave is utterly oblivious next to him, chatting about something meaningless, Blaine doesn't know what. He watches the door of the bathroom and thinks about Kurt’s honesty before Dave arrived, the way he’d bared his throat to Blaine, put himself at his mercy, only to feel the knife of rejection anyway. He thinks and he considers. And maybe – just maybe – the seeds have been cracked. Maybe not everything was lost in the fire. Maybe there’ll be a chance for the seedlings to grow after all.

Kurt steps out from the bathroom, cool eyed and straight backed. When he meets Blaine’s eyes, he wavers for a moment.

Just maybe.

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and/or comments would be greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading. <3


End file.
